


Starve the Ego, Feed the Soul

by Iridium (IridiumFlames)



Category: Free!
Genre: 30 Days of Rin, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, M/M, Making Out, also wow i didn't realize it was literally just rin and sousuke, it's mostly fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-21
Updated: 2016-01-21
Packaged: 2018-05-13 10:00:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5703505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IridiumFlames/pseuds/Iridium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rin didn’t seem entirely angry, then; the little line between his brows never turned into a proper scowl, but it started off the day with an argument, and as he scrolls through his phone he realizes it was one of the first in a long day.<br/>---------</p><p>Rin has a bad day and Sousuke tries to remind him how amazing he is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Starve the Ego, Feed the Soul

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy! I know the celebration is supposed to be 30 Days of _Rin_ , but out of everyone who is most likely to celebrate Rin? Sousuke is, so it's from his point of view; I'm not entirely sure I got across what i intended to here, but I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> The AU we all know and love where Sousuke follows Rin to Australia
> 
> EDIT: I forgot to actually tag it as the fan event it was part of, whoop dang it's fixed now

The oil sizzles, bubbles sparking along the surface of the pan until a toss of onions cools it down. Sousuke grabs the cutting board and deftly scrapes some chicken, already cut, into the pan with the rest. Broth is next, then mushrooms, wait until it’s almost boiling out of their value-store frying pan and then simmer until the chicken is cooked.

Sousuke swivels in place to check on the rice, the tiny kitchen counter barely fitting an already small rice cooker. Good, it’s got about ten minutes left- what time is it?

He grabs his phone and feels his chest sink a little. In his attempt to get dinner done before Rin got home, he’d missed about ten texts from Rin himself. That can’t be a good sign, considering this morning.

Rin starts off the day well enough, even leaving a little early. Sousuke catches a goodbye kiss before leaving for his own morning workout, and Rin was griping about  _something_ – about the cat, that’s it, the stray outside their apartments which Sousuke has _not_  been feeding. Seriously, they just happen to have extra tins of cat food lying around, and it’s summer, Rin. He’d have to be heartless to not use it when the gray tabby in the nearby alley inched closer to their building with each heat wave. Australia is scorching enough most of the year. He’s only being practical.

Rin didn’t seem entirely angry, then; the little line between his brows never turned into a proper scowl, but it started off the day with an argument, and as he scrolls through his phone he realizes it was one of the first in a long day. Some kind of delay on the bus schedule? That particular message is half-composed of swearing, anyway, and then Rin’s messages drop from simple whining to no emotion at all. Sousuke grinds his jaw, trying to figure out what’s going on. If he’s lucky, Rin’s phone just died on him, and a dramatic retelling of his day is the worst thing waiting for him when he walks back through their doorway. But if the tone of his last few messages says anything, it means Rin’s shutting down, trying to keep from blowing up at everything by cutting off contact entirely. That’s an entirely different demon.

“Shit, Rin, what’s going on?” he mutters, turning back to their dinner. At least he’s got dinner under control. He cuts the gas on the meat and vegetables and turns back to the rice, which dings cheerily as it finishes its cooking time. He allows himself a small smile at how smoothly everything’s turning out. Not a second later, their door slams open, bouncing back against the wall and almost closing again from the force. Muffled cursing follows and the door opens again, only barely gentled by the person walking through it.

He feels his smile drip off his face. So it’s option two today, okay. Dinner can wait.

He’ll have to be careful here; when Rin’s like this he snaps at everything, and Sousuke’s knows he’s stubborn enough to bite back, but that’s not what either of them need right now. He leaves the kitchen, rounding the corner to a redhead with half his fire extinguished and the rest of him white with anger. Sousuke keeps himself as neutral as possible. “Rin?”

Rin looks up at him. His face is tight and his eyes are red– more than usual, that is. “Is dinner ready yet?” he croaks, dropping his swim bag by the door.

“Yeah. Go sit down, I’ll get you a bowl.” Sousuke doesn’t miss the sloppiness when his swim bag remains on the floor behind him. Rin always takes his things to their room, puts everything away properly almost too tidily. He hasn’t let himself cry yet; tears are still pooled at the edges of his eyes. Everything about him is screaming tension, but until he feels like talking Sousuke’s not about to press for details, and he only watches as Rin shuffles out of his jacket and sits down at the table without a word.

Dinner is delicious, and silent, but once they’re done Sousuke grabs Rin by the shoulders. He’s patient but he’s not Makoto, he’s only going to wait so long. “Rin. Talk.” He softens his words by kneading at Rin’s shoulders, his hands growing gentle as they meet the slope of his neck.

Rin glares at him, a fight still flickering in his eyes. “I’m not what you’re mad at,” Sousuke says levelly. “Just tell me how your day went.”

He has to remind him of that. It’s part of this thing they’re working on, where Sousuke isn’t as blunt as he maybe often wants to be, and Rin doesn’t let his anger get the best of him. There’s no rule against fighting often, or loudly, but weirdly enough it seems to have made their trademark fiery arguments less common. And lately, Sousuke doesn’t want the way Rin feels to not be his problem.

Rin sighs and some of his tension leaves. He chews on his lip, his eyes falling somewhere around Sousuke’s neckline. After a minute he finally speaks. “I’m gonna go change clothes. I’m coming back,” he adds, turning on his way to the bedroom. “Just- I’m coming back, just wait for me a sec.”

Sousuke wants to object and follow him, demand some kind of answer after a totally silent dinner. But he grumbles to himself and settles in on their sofa to wait, arms crossed.

Not a minute later Rin pads back to the sofa, his jeans and cardigan gone in favor of a tank top and sweats. Even when things are tense as they are, Sousuke can’t help but bite back a smile– it’s a muscle top instead of his usual racerback, and the top hangs a little too loosely from Rin’s frame. He’s stolen one of Sousuke’s. Rin flops against him, kicking one leg irritably against the sofa to get comfortable until he’s properly smushed into Sousuke’s arm. He leans back and waits. A timeless minute passes. He twists slightly to thread the fingers of his other hand through Rin’s hair, and right before he gives into his own curiosity, Rin talks.

“The bus got delayed and made me late to practice, which is shit, right, but whatever,” he starts, his voice shaking with frustration.

“It pissed you off though, didn’t it?”

“Of course it did, you’d be pissed if you were half an hour late to the last practice before time trial week.”

“Point taken,” Sousuke amends, with a laugh that doesn’t have much humor in it. Of course, that was the reason Rin left early today to begin with.

 

“I get there late as it is, and then when I finally get in the water, that one asshole transfer from fucking  _wherever_  is three seconds faster than me on long-distance freestyle, which I’m supposed to be specializing in. I’ve been working my ass off for months– ” He sighs and shifts on the couch.

“Come here,” Sousuke says, laying down and pulling Rin on top of him. He doesn’t resist it, falling gently on Sousuke’s chest.

He holds him in a hug while he thinks about what to say. If he wants to sleep in bed tonight, he probably shouldn’t mention that Rin is  _also_  an asshole transfer. Rin’s going to beat himself up regardless, and he can’t go with his first response and tell him to get over it.

Rin sniffles and he feels wetness seep through his shirt, the smallest amount of tears. Up till this he’d been fine, slightly irritated on Rin’s behalf, but this makes Sousuke’s breath catch in his throat, sharp and bitter.

It’s not a secret for either of them that Rin is dedicated. The team was in the process of picking its competing lineup for their next national tournament, and Rin had been scraping his times shorter and shorter, working hard enough to spark more than a few fights between them. Can he blame Sousuke for worrying? He knows the reason Sousuke’s not on the team with him, he knows the risk; they fight over it regardless.

Any setback has potential to hit both of them in the heart, and Rin’s not the type to immediately get over something. It has to burn through him completely, or he’ll never really settle.

Sousuke should probably something useful soon, instead of leaving his boyfriend to cry into his chest. He goes with logic first. “Hey, this is only nationals. You’re not training for regionals, you’re nowhere near the qualifying time trials. And you haven’t even been training long-distance, have you?”

Rin pulls in a shaky breath, and his words are unsteady. “No, but I wanted to- I can try. I’ve already gotten this far, why shouldn’t I give it a shot?”

Sousuke ruffles through his hair in sympathy. Of course he ran trial for something he hasn’t trained for. Typical Rin, reaching for everything he wants regardless of whether it’s even possible.

“I know, it doesn’t hurt to try. But you’ve already made it onto the national relay team the past two years. You’ve practically got a spot waiting for you back in Japan.” Rin huffs into his chest, not entirely ready to be comforted.

“I’m not saying you need to slow down because you won’t. But… You don’t have to be the best at every single event, you know.” He tries to avoid the word ‘perfect.’ Sousuke’s as guilty of perfectionism as Rin is and doesn’t really want a reminder.

Rin looks at him, his mouth set in a pout. “Yeah, well.” He clearly wants to be mad, but Sousuke’s made a good point, one he can’t argue.

“You’re already kicking ass at the events you’re actually training for. Even asshole transfer ass.” Rin laughs into his chest, and Sousuke considers it a personal victory that it sounds less watery. He tilts his head back against the couch, pretending to think. “I know you were getting overexcited over something last month. Something like, ‘a ten-second lead on every team member in fly?’ I’m not sure if I remember correctly.”

He looks back down to gauge Rin’s reaction and is met by still-teary eyes, but more importantly a grin. “It’s 10.2 seconds and you fucking know it.”

“Oh, really? How’d I forget?” Sousuke feigns surprise, which quickly settles into the soft feeling he only gets around Rin. “I know you’re pissed, but you’re good. You’re one of the best on your team. One trial for something you weren’t seriously training for won’t slow you down.”

He slides his hands out of Rin’s hair, over his shoulders, and leans in to sneak a kiss on his cheek. “I doubt you can even  _be_  slowed down, when you’re after something you want.”

“Don’t be a sap.” Rin smacks him with no force, and turns away to hide a smile. He’s not crying anymore, though, and he looks back at Sousuke with gratitude in his eyes. Success.

“I’m not being a sap,” Sousuke retorts, keeping his face deadpan just to irritate Rin, and proceeds to cover his forehead in soft kisses. Normally he _wouldn’t_ be such a sap, but Rin’s smiling again, and he can cover himself a little under the guise of being purposely annoying.

His attack causes Rin to turn a delightful red that touches the tops of his ears. “That’s it, I’m leaving, stop hugging me,” he yells, grinning, and pushes at Sousuke’s arms with nowhere near his real strength.

“Hm, not letting you,” he says, with a wide smile he can’t really contain.

Sousuke expands the range of his kisses to include Rin’s shoulders and he kisses Sousuke back full on the mouth as his grin spills over into laughter, sharp and happy.

He doesn’t know how long they lie there just kissing, enjoying the feeling of each other’s mouths. Rin is heavy in the best way, draped over him and wiggling one arm under his head to push him closer. Sousuke tries to deepen the kiss a little, but Rin shakes his head, pulling away just barely to breathe against his lips. “I just wanna kiss you right now,” And hey, he can’t argue that.

They move gently against each other, the usual heat between them never building, but his eyes must have closed at some point, because when they finally separate to breathe, he’s made breathless all over again. Rin’s smiling back, panting a little and looking infinitely more relaxed.

His smile dims, settling into fondness and he scratches his hand through the back of Sousuke’s hair. “Thanks for that.”

“For what?” Sousuke questions, because his intentions weren’t entirely altruistic. He could very easily keep going right about now.

“For keeping me from being an asshole when I got home. I know I was pissed but it would’ve lasted longer without you.” He runs his hand up the back of Sousuke’s neck, ruffling his hair gently.

Sousuke can’t help it; he leans into the touch. He tries to sound as unaffected as possible. “Yeah, well. I’m an asshole sometimes too, right?”

“Hell yes you are,” Rin mumbles good-naturedly. “I still love you though,” he adds, leaning in to kiss Sousuke’s nose.

Sousuke looks back at him, speechless. This is how Rin should be, always. He’s fireworks and summer sunrises, and even laying on the couch with Sousuke, he’s a steady furnace of life, so idealistic and full of light. Sousuke’s struck by how much he never wants to leave, to see every second of Rin lighting up the world. He’s half a second from telling Rin exactly this when his brain decides to disengage from his mouth.

“I love you so much,” he stutters out, kicking himself as he says it. That wasn’t what he meant at all, but Rin’s smiling at him, so who cares?

“Holy shit, you should see your face,” he cackles, grabbing for his phone– hell no, Rin’s going to try to videotape him again and there’s got to be a dozen of those videos by now, it’s just unfair. He lunges for the phone before Rin can get to it, and they both fall off the couch in a giant tangle of legs, Sousuke bursting into laughter despite himself. Rin moved across the world twice now for a dream, chasing a piece of immortality. Keeping pace with him is a rush all on its own, and Sousuke never wants to stop.

 

**Author's Note:**

> the title of this fic is from [this Glitch mob song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpmKjJ4YU_c) because I thought it fit the mood of the fic well; it sounds like something that's usually very intense slowing down to be more at peace, at least to me
> 
> constructive criticism is encouraged, hell any criticism is encouraged, it's 2:00 AM and i am very tired i need all the help i can get


End file.
